Two Major F’s In A Marriage

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There are two major F’s in a marriage. Now I am sure there could be more if we really looked but today I am looking at forgiving and forgetting.

In a marriage there are lots of disagreements. No matter how much you proclaim that there won’t be any trust me there will be. That after all is going to happen when you pair two imperfect people together in the same house and the same relationship for the rest of their lives.

 

Forgiveness:

There seems to be an unlimited need for this. When my husband and I first got married it seemed everything we did rubbed each other wrong. It’s totally natural. I remember thinking when we first got married that my husband must really dislike me. The truth of the matter is that we are to different people. The same as in your marriage you and your husband are two different people joined in the union of marriage. You both are coming from different backgrounds, different upbringings and you both may have different expectations. However you are trying to make these differences mess into one.

 

Forgiving our spouse during these differences of opinions is key. Do not be to prideful to say sorry first. Without giving forgiveness we can become resentful. Resentment has no place in a marriage because it leads to a whole new world of problems. Things will be said out of spite and actions will take place that will make you want to run. But remember when we forgive we are moving forward in growing as a couple and in Christ as well.

 

Forgive just like our Heavenly Father forgives us. We need to be willing to forgive because our husbands are not prefect. Surprise we are not perfect either.

 

Forget:

Once a disagreement has been settled. Apologies have been given and all has been forgive then it is up to us to forget it. We as women have memories like an elephant when it comes to remembering flaws and things that have hurt us in the past. Now this is good if we are using them as a lessons learned, however, those trapped up memories can also cause a lot of harm when we use them the wrong way.

 

Why do we choose to use our memories to hurt our husbands? I am guilty myself. I can remember things that happened when my husband and I first got married. It took me a long time to make myself quit bringing them up. As a matter of fact I didn’t stop until I seen the look of pain shoot across my husbands face. The fact of the matter is he is a totally different man than when we first got married.

 

When we choose not to forget past arguments often times we replay them over and over again in our heads. This in turn causes us stress. It drags up memories that would be best forgotten. Worst of all they can make us sick both physically and spiritually.

 

Holding on to the past causes us the inability to move forward. Forgetting allows healing. It allows growth. It also provides a feeling of security to our husbands because they know that they truly are forgiven.

 

Imagine if God were to pull out all of our past transgressions every time He felt like it. We would constantly feel beaten down. What would be the point in constantly trying to be pleasing? Salvation would lose a bit of it sweet feeling.

 

Try to apply these two F’s today and see how much healing power it can have in your marriage it can have.

 

 

Until Next Time Just Keep Soaring 4 Him,

 

I would like to invite you to my Facebook group Christian Homemakers in Training where we dive into homemaking, motherhood, marriage and group devotions. After all, we all need a safe place to grow together, right?

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