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Fall is here in my neck of the woods. Not that I am complaining mind you. As a matter of fact I love all the changes that are taking place. I mean there are cooler nights, beautiful colors replacing green leave and well there just seems to be a slower pace that goes hand in hand with fall. Fall also reminds me of the changes that have taken place in my marriage. Yesterday being my wedding anniversary it gave me a lot to think about.
You see when my husband and I got married 14 years ago, we were young and clueless. Both of us were leading a less than desirable life. We were both under the impression that marriage was easy. After all the only thing you had to do was love each other. Serving God was the furthest thing from our mind. In fact we were more about serving ourselves. We had no clue that marriage took work and that it required more than just love. Within days of our wedding day we started an endless cycle of arguments. These turned into hurt feelings. It even caused us to strongly consider the possibility that we didn’t know each other as well as we thought we did. There were times that things that got so bad we were unsure if we even wanted to stick around to actually get to know each other any better.Four years into our marriage I changed the whole dynamics of our marriage. I choose to serve God. In doing so changes were made in me that caused me to not see the faults of my husband but the faults that were within me. As I grew closer and closer to God I realized more and more what it was that God seen in my husband. I was able to view him in a new and different light. I was no longer looking at him as a bitter and angry wife I was looking at am as a child of God. It was when that happened I started to notice changes happening to my husband as well. Soon after my husband also turned his life over to God. And just like the changes that occur in the seasons. Changes started happening in our marriage. And those changes just keep on coming.
Changes in a marriage should continue just like the changes in us should continue to happen as we grow closer to God. Our marriages evolve with the seasons of life we are present in as well. Currently my husband and I seem to be in the tag team stage. Somewhere along our journey we learned how to work together and not against each other. We learned that in order to lead our family the way God designed us to we needed to have Him in the center. We also learned that we needed to fall into the roles that God lays out for us in the Bible.
Something else I have learned is that change can occur when we as wives take the first steps. To many times I hear the excuses that we don’t have to fall into the roles as submissive wives when our husbands do not lead. This is totally false. Because when we ourselves change it promotes change in our husbands as well. We set the moods in our relationships more than we will truly ever know.
What kind of changes do you see happening in your marriage? If there is no change maybe it is time to ponder the reason why no changes within your relationship are occurring.I would like to invite you to my Facebook group Christian Homemakers in Training where we dive into homemaking, motherhood, marriage and group devotions. After all, we all need a safe place to grow together, right?