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In this day and age it is getting harder and harder to be a positive light in such a seemingly dark world. Holding on to Biblical principles are also getting harder and harder to place inside our children’s hearts thanks to media and other outside sources. Marriage has become a joke. Families are being broken for the lack of interest partners have to uphold their end on what being married in the sight of God means. Loyalty in a marriage seems to be something that is unheard of. I can not tell you how many times I have been told of a marriage breaking up because they just forgot that marriage means for better and for worse. They forgot that when you marry someone it means you are done with searching for someone else. Marriage is a UNION that needs to be kept at all cost.
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” So we say with confidence, “The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?” Remember your leaders, who spoke the word of God to you. Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith. Hebrews 13:4-7
Then there are other relationships that don’t even make it to marriage but go through all the other steps. I remember in my own personal family that living with someone other that your husband was strongly discouraged. Fornication was also strongly frowned upon. Yet now it seems that no longer do you need to get married to “play house” and it is ok. We wonder why this problem continues to grow. It is because we act like it is ok.
Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. 1 Corinthians 6:18
Now I am not saying to quickly turn your back on those who have made those choices however I am saying there is no need to throw a parade. Why do we get excited about others going down a dark path? Why do we not set out to try and talk to those people? A lot of times it is because we are just going along with the crowd.The problem with this is what kind of message is this showing our children. We are teaching them to ignore sin. Pretend it isn’t there. We are also teaching them to go with the crowd not against the crowd. Otherwise someone might get offended. However as Christians aren’t we suppose to do just that. When we look at the life of Jesus, we see that He stepped on many toes. He was quick to show love to those who need it. Tell them the ways to change their lives and then reach out to help them. He also called out sins and refused to go with the crowd.
We have a problem. We as Christians have grown so comfortable in going with the grain that we are making it harder on ourselves to raise children who will someday stand up for what is Biblically correct. After all why would they? We are to set the example for our children. It is time we start doing just that. Quit caring what the world will think and instead worry about what the Father thinks. Isn’t that how we are suppose to be. Are we becoming part of the problem with the world or are we standing up and being part of the solutions?
Until Next Time Just Keep Soaring 4 Him,
I would like to invite you to my Facebook group Christian Homemakers in Training where we dive into homemaking, motherhood, marriage and group devotions. After all, we all need a safe place to grow together, right?
I had thought about not commenting on this post. I know a lot of people may take offense to my comment. I wanted to add my two cents worth, as usual. lol
I’m not making excuses for people, but I know in some cases is what holds people back from getting married can be money and/or not wanting to really commit because of how many marriages go under. They want to be really sure that they can live with this person for the rest of their lives and not want to kill them! lol
In all seriousness… I know my 2 sons aren’t married..yet. They both live with their fiancees and they both are expecting a child. Neither of them have the money to get married. It’s $40 just for the marriage license. Then there’s the bloodwork that now is required. My one son has no health insurance and hasn’t been able to get a steady job. His fiancee has 2 small children ages 3 & 1 which he is struggling to help support. They are getting married soon because he will be leaving for basic training after his son is born. My other son, I don’t know if they will ever have the money. They are just barely surviving. Her pregnancy was totally unexpected.
I know these sound like excuses, but it’s a fact of life these days. My husband and I aren’t “legally” married. We have been together for 3 years. Our pastor is aware of our relationship and he applauds the fact that we at least made a commitment. (We both come from bad 1st marriages.) We made a promise to God as well as each other that we would be faithful to each other, to love each other. And one of these days, when we have the money, our pastor is going to marry us.
In today’s society, a lot of states recognize long-term committed relationships as a legal union. We are in NY, and we can actually file papers as a domestic couple and we would still have all the same rights as those “legally” married. And maybe that is part of the problem. It has become too easy to just not take that last step. Hopefully more people will come to understand that there’s a difference between living together and being married.
I know that in the Bible, when one was “betrothed” to be married it was the same commitment as getting married. The only way to end the relationship at that point was through a divorce. The only difference was, I think, that the couple was not allowed sexual relations with each other. Don’t quote me on that, but that is my understanding of the word “betrothed”.
I know I should be one to talk. It’s like the pot calling the kettle black. Believe me, deep in my conscience it does bother me that we’re not “legally” married. It is keeping me from taking a step in my faith. This time, though, I want to be absolutely sure. I messed up a lot of lives, including my children, by staying in a bad marriage as long as I did (I was married 25 yrs.) I thought I was doing the right thing. Sometimes it’s better to leave a bad marriage than to do further damage to all parties involved. I really want us to be married by our pastor. I want my friends and family to be there. And we will some day. I’m glad that we at least made a promise to each other and to God and that our pastor knows the entire truth.
Let me start off with thank you for stopping by and reading the post. I also want to express that though our points of view may differ never feel afraid to express what is on your mind. Though I understand wanting to make sure that you can live with a person it is just not Biblically sound. I also understand divorces can leave a sour taste in the mouths of those who have lived through or seen them because I come from a long line of those who have been divorced. Some states do have the “common law” marriages. But this is man’s law not Gods. This topic in it’s self could be a post all on it’s own. I also understand getting married can be expensive but there are ways around this as well. For example instead of wedding presents everyone could chip in to pay for the blood testing and such.
We can not pick and choose what commandments and instructions God wants us to live by. Do we make mistakes? Yes. Do we fall short? Of course we do. I make mistakes daily and am still learning myself things that I need to do. But to continue doing things and knowing that it is wrong is being defiant to God. It would be the same as telling our children do not cross the road alone. They know that they can cross it without our assistance and yet they were told not to. So when they cross the road they have done wrong and as a parent we must take action because they are being defiant.
I am a bit concerned that your preacher has made light of this whole situation as well since as a preacher his goal is to help lead others in their spiritual walk. I once had a preacher who allowed two members to live together, teach Sunday School and hold offices in our church (not our current church) needless to say once members found out it did not end well.
I myself have family members who have children and are living with their boyfriends and though it makes me sad I still love them just the same. Do they talk to me about their living arrangements? No because they know where my stands is. I have to make my stands clear after all I have 3 boys and a girl who are watching what I do, listen to what I say and look to see if I back up what I say.
I hope that all I am saying to you is understood that I am expressing my view out of love. By no means am I judging and yet at some point we as Christians must take a stand. We must hold on to the Biblical truths. I feel that you very well know all this and that possibly the Holy Spirit is working on you about this situation since you said that it is keeping you from taking steps in your walk of faith,
I will be praying for you and your family. And again thank you for taking the time to present your point of view here and doing so in a respectful manner 🙂
This is very well said Bridget! I admire your respect for God’s Word and the compassion and grace you have on such a hard topic. Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
Thank you so much!! That really means a lot coming from you. Thank you for stopping by 🙂