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Disappointments in marriage happen. After all our husbands are not exact prototypes of us. They are unique individuals with unique ideas and personalities. Their desires are not our desires are not our desires. Their wants are not our wants. Not to mention their needs are different than our needs. This can cause disappointment when we really want our husbands to understand what we want, need and feel. Lets face it we are not mind readers and nor are they. These disappointments can either make us stronger as a couple or they can divide us. It is however up to us which we are going to allow it to do.
Make Us Stronger:
Our disappointments can lead to wonderful growth for us a couple and personally. As a couple we can use these moments to strengthen our communication skills with each other. We can use that time to learn more about our husband and what makes him tick. We can also use this time to enlighten them as to how we feel about a situation as well. You can learn how to help with certain things. For example maybe you have discovered your husband is a procrastinator. You then know that you have to delicate tasks to him in a certain manner to keep you both from getting frustrated.
Spiritually we can grow because we are able to put some of those Christ like attitudes that we study about to use. We are able in this situation to learn to view our husbands with grace and understanding. We are able to practice submission when the disappointment is due to a choice you would not have made. Plan and simple it allows us to grow because it allows us to apply everything we have learned.
Sometimes we forget that our men are just like us. They are juggling many balls even if we don’t realize it. They are juggling balance between work and home. They balance time with us and time with the children. They also have the weight of being the family’s leader on their shoulders. This is a lot. So just like us sometime they drop the ball. Sometimes they can’t fulfill everything we would like for them to.
Or We Can Allow It To Divide Us:
In our stubborn nature sometimes we can just flat refuse to understand our husbands position. We can focus on the disappointments that we have and nothing else. This causes conflict. Which leads to hurt feelings for both parties. This happens to lead to resentment. Finally we start viewing our husbands in an unflattering manner which leads to both of you turning against each other instead of clinging to each other.
What Can We Do:
- Seek out the reason you truly are so disappointed. A lot of times the disappointment has nothing to do with our husbands and more to do with something inside of us.
- Be willing to calmly communicate with your husband. This takes effort and time to do. But the end rewards is totally worth it.
- Be willing to let it go. Once is all said and done be willing to drop it. Let it go and don’t bring it up anymore.
Remember disappointments can make or break a relationship. Which will you choose?
Until Next Time Just Keep Soaring 4 Him,
I would like to invite you to my Facebook group Christian Homemakers in Training where we dive into homemaking, motherhood, marriage and group devotions. After all, we all need a safe place to grow together, right?