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Today I am blessed to have Mandy from Women Of Worship joining us. I am sure that what she has to say will be just as much of a blessing to you as it has been to me. ~Bridget
In today’s world, it is very hard to trust. Our world is full of sin – and even good, godly people struggle. Our sin nature doesn’t go away after salvation. This includes everyone- even our husbands. While we might love and adore our husbands, sometimes we all, me included, struggle to trust them and their decision making. There is a real heart issue that goes on in these instances – and often, it isn’t what we think it is.
I want to start this post by saying this. I am not suggesting by anything written below that I believe you should stay in an abusive relationship. I am talking to the woman who is in a good marriage, with a husband who is, as best He can, doing what is right. This doesn’t mean perfect or sinless – but I am not promoting any woman to put herself, or her children, in an abusive situation.
The real heart of distrust is our heart issue. There have been times when my husband has made a suggestion, or asked that our family take a step of faith (or not take a step of faith) that I have not understood. Times like this included:
1. We would not go on the waiting list for our adoption until we had 80% of the money raised. He wants to be a good steward of the finances and not go into debt. I, on the other hand, wanted to complete our home-study process and go right on the list, no matter the consequence.
2. We had been faithfully tithing for a few years – but when I started to work outside the home, we didn’t increase our giving. Hubby realized this – at the same time of our adoption. He decided it was time to make things right. I, on the other hand, thought we were saving for a good, and yes, even Godly, thing. We uped the tithe.
3. Our church that we were in was having a hard time.There was no youth group for the kids. Hubby was in leadership. I was ready to walk out the door – Hubby felt like we needed to stay. We did stay.
These are just a few examples over the past few years where my husband and I have not always agreed on the course of direction our family would take. Often, the choices are finacial – but they could shape differently in your home. However, after examining my heart each time, I found that there was more then just trusting and submiting to my Hubs that was in order. I was struggling to trust God.
I believe that God has placed my husband as the head of our home. He is the direct leader – spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially – the list goes on. I believe that there is a blessing in following the command to submit to our husbands. Even though, in each of the situations listed above, I have disagreed, God has taught me something more about Himself, more about my hubby, and grown my faith.
When we struggle to trust the leadership that God has placed in our life, we are ultimately struggling to submit to the authortiy of God. I am in no way a meek, ran over wife. In each case, I stated my opinion. Often more then once! However, I respect the place of authority that my hubby has in our home. I want our home to be blessed. So, I turn my eyes back to the Father, and slowly begin to open my hand and let go of the control I so desperately want to have.
Let me share with you how God has blessed us in each of the three situations listed above, but going in reverse order:
3. The Church ended up shutting down on its own. God knew the doors would be closing, and my hubby and I were needed to be there on leadership to help it transition smoothly. Had we left when I was ready, there would have been hurt relationships that may have never been restored. Soon, we will have a cook out with those wonderful couples we ministered with. The families of that church – although scattered into many, smaller churches, are still connected.
2. I don’t believe in the prosperity gospel – I don’t tithe just to see what God will give me. However, I have had extreme peace, and we continue to save for our adoption and make all our bills. We even have a few wants.
1. We haven’t raised this money yet. However, Scott knew about some fundraising ideas that would hopefully help us get to where we need to be. He was willing to re-evaluate our situation after a certain date, so that we both felt comfortable with where we were at. It will be about a month after the completed home study – but I know my God can do big things in a month.
I hope you see the blessing in trusting God – and trusting your husband. Trust is a two way street. The more you trust your husband, the more he trust you- and will value your opinion. If you just go at him like the crazy woman found often in Proverbs – you will find your husband will be less likely to listen to your side. However,remember that there is spiritual blessings to trusting your husband. He was given to you by the Lord. God has placed him (your husband) in the place of authority. So, honor the Lord and trust your husband.
Mandy is passionate about two things: the Word of God and Souls of Men (and ladies!) She is married to her best friend, and gets the privilege to help him raise their three blessings. Marrying a widow and dealing with infertility, Mandy has a heart for orphans – and so her children are truly her reward, and her family is excited to grow their family through adoption! She is the founder of Women of Worship, and also blogs at Marriage, Motherhood and Missions and a look at the Book. Her greatest desire is to bring women into a deeper relationship with the Lover of their Souls, Jesus Christ. You can follow her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google+ and Instagram.I would like to invite you to my Facebook group Christian Homemakers in Training where we dive into homemaking, motherhood, marriage and group devotions. After all, we all need a safe place to grow together, right?